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[59sarah]

I wonder if anyone can help me.  My 8 year old son complains that the children in his class don't let him join in their games (typically a running game).  I have tried speaking to the Rebbe who tells the kids to let him join in but he claims they don't try to catch him.  I want to know how I can help make him become liked by class members.  I also want to know how I can stop him from constantly berating the boys in his class.  On one hand, I need to maintain an open relationship with him so he feels free to tell me his issues.  On the other hand, I think some of the bullying may not be as bad as he is implying!  I have spoken to the Rebbe etc who has warned the boys to be nice etc.  I tried speaking to two parents of boys (one said my son doesn't listen to the rules so therefore they don't let him play) and another said he likes playing with him when he brings a ball.  Please tell me how I can solve this dilemmas.  I desperately want him to be happy in break time, know  his social skills require improvement.  He is a very clever child and hates being pushed around (like boys typically do!).  Please help.  Thanks in advance

[Rabbi K]

Try a program called Olweus at http://www.olweus.org/public/index.page
We use it our School is has proven to be very affective.

[rroth]

You could also look into Rona Novick's program- BRAVE.

[pearlkatz]

www.bullies2buddies.com/
teaches victims how to react.

[ybcaybca]

I set up a 0 tolerance policy towards bullying, and at the same time build up on achdus and friendship. The kids in my 2nd grade class know, that there will be a consequence if they bully someone. They know that theyu can come over to me at anytime if someone is bothering them. I also coach the "victim" in how to respond. 1 question I have him ask the "bully" is "WHY did you do that to me?" This has worked many times so far.
I take the bully out of a game for a i.e. "30 second penalty" or the like if he starts making fun, name calling etc.
Reward and consequence...

[risaacs]

I agree that you need to work on bullying from two sides. the first is a zero tolerance. The second and this is not always done is to build community in our school that supports every child, and provide a sense of responsibility to each other. Children also need role models who not only talk the talk but walk the walk.

[simmer18]

i started a TIKI program from the chofetz chaim heritage foundation and that was EXTREMELY effective in my classroom